Can I Get A Witness?

”We need a witness to our lives. There's a billion people on the planet, what does any one life really mean? But in a marriage, you're promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things, all of it, all of the time, every day. You're saying 'Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go unwitnessed because I will be your witness'."
Shall We Dance 2004 Beverly Clark

This is one of my all-time favorite quotes from a movie. I love this quote because it speaks to a beautiful truth. I love the idea that marriage is a place where we can notice one another in grand moments and in the most mundane moments as well. Don't get me wrong, I know that marriage is hard work and it is usually more balancing a budget and taking out the trash than it is hearts, flowers and family vacations. In a world where the internet has given us all the audience we can fathom with a dearth of social networks, it warms my heart to think that there might be someone who would commit to noticing my life. We can find friends to care about some things and nosey people will care about other things, but this promise to care about everything is more than wonderful.

Imagine, someone to notice the twitch of your eyelids just before you wake and greet the day. Someone to notice whether you taste the sauce from the spoon or from your hand. Someone to notice that your favorite mug is not clean but it is time for a cup of tea...so he washes it and prepares the tea just the way you like it...because he noticed. Someone to notice that you had a long day and don't feel like talking...yet. Someone to notice that your outward toddler tantrum of "leave me alone" is really your way of begging for a long hug that provides the necessary shelter for putting the pieces back together again. In the movie, Susan Sarandon's character is hurt because her husband pursues an interest in dance and does not share it with her...the reason for this is...well...you just need to rent the movie. It's too complex to sum up neatly for the sake of the blog. She hires a private detective to follow him because she is afraid that he is cheating but stops the investigation when she finds that he is taking dance classes. All she wants to do is live out her promise to be his witness because that is what she promised in her "I do".

We all want to be seen, heard, noticed and actively loved. This is the call to be a witness to someone's life. It always hurts me to watch the scene in the movie Brown Sugar when Sydney asks Kelby if he read her articles and he responds, "I read the one about me." That's looking in the mirror and witnessing yourself, you big dummy!!! She wants you to witness HER life!! (Which is why I cry (every time) when she ends up with Dre, who, by the way, not only read everything she wrote, but memorized a line from an article! Swoon!) Outside of the context of marriage, I've heard preachers ask, "Can I get a witness" to their preaching of the gospel and the congregation will usually respond with a hearty "Yes!" or "Amen, preacher!" I wonder what our response is when we are facing the gospel truth of the life of a loved one who wordlessly asks...Can I get a witness? I pray that today, we will all hear and give a "Yes" or "Amen, preacher" or "I've read everything you've ever written!"


Shalom